Lost In Mind

Lost in my mind, lost in my thoughts. I never know where Life will take me next. One thought through my mind and I'm on to the next. Some linger a little longer than others. What's got me so quiet? Life. I don't know where I'm going and I don't know when I'll get there. But when I do, I'll know. I'm looking through what's in front of me and not quite sure how to get to the other side. Explosions won't work... Nor will guns. Now what? I know how to break things down. I know how to kick things over. But what happens when you're talking about the future? You can't just break the future down or kick it over. I feel like I need to be strategic about this... Methodical. Like a game of Chess. And something tells me I don't want to have my opponent be the one to say "check mate." Taking my time and being patient is painful for me. I want to be proactive. I want to at least FEEL like I'm doing something with my life. Like I'm grabbing the Bull by the horns. Sometimes though, you have to take a step back and reassess the situation before fully knowing what to do. Well... I'm stepping back. I need a clear head on my shoulders. This is my future I'm dealing with. That's some heavy stuff. It's my decision as to what to do with it. And having that kind of responsibility for myself... well, it just doesn't seem like something to be taken lightly. I can screw up a whole lot of ways. Unfortunately, I see very few ways of not messing something up. I guess that's why I have people in my life I can count on. Because no matter what, I know there are certain people who will look at me and say "Paige, that's just dumb." That's what I like about them though. Brutal honesty. I can take it. And if I can take that, can't I take anything that Life wants to throw at me? Including my future? You bet your bottom dollar. :)